What does it mean to be emotionally untouchable? One definition describes it as: “When you’re truly at peace and in touch with yourself. Nothing anyone says or does bothers you and no negativity can touch you.” This happens when you step into your power and live your life from the heart, allowing all emotions to flow through you rather than creating limitations within you.
Vishen Lakhiani is an entrepreneur, author, public speaker and founder of Mindvalley, a powerful personal growth company. He and a few other speakers beautifully describe how to be untouchable throughout their video, which is linked in the sources of this article. Vishen begins by describing how we limit our true potential by caring too much about what other people think of us. We seek validation, fear rejection and hold ourselves back because we’re scared of judgement from others. The fear of criticism is one of the biggest factors in why people don’t go out and live their dreams.
So how do you become untouchable to those criticisms? There are 3 “Life Hacks” or techniques these speakers discuss in the video, but before they dive into each one, Vishen brings up an important point to remember: It’s the understanding that it’s not you.
If you’re giving a speech and people don’t clap, it’s not you, but rather what or how you said something. If you write a book and it gets a bad review, it’s not about you but rather what you wrote. Detaching yourself from your work and your highest goal is crucial in not having criticism affect you.
The first technique is all about radical forgiveness. This is the process of forgiving into love. Not just forgiving someone, but actually loving them as a fellow human and holding empathy in your heart. If someone has deeply hurt you, understanding that ‘hurt people, hurt people’ is vital in truly embodying in radical forgiveness.
This requires looking at their life as a whole, and seeing all the reasons why that person could justify doing what they’ve done. If someone stole money from you, did they need it? Did they have a child that they needed to feed? Or perhaps they were poor growing up and that way of life has been embedded in them.
Going through all these possibilities and holding empathy for them is radical forgiveness, and it’s extremely powerful. It frees you from holding on the burden of hate and allows those negative emotions to flow through you as you release them.
You Are Enough
The next life hack in becoming untouchable is understanding that you are enough, right now, just as you are. The common denominator of every emotional issue comes from the thought that we aren’t enough. It is a compensation for a feeling that we need more because we aren’t good enough, smart enough, pretty enough or worth enough.
But the truth is, plain and simple, that we are. You are enough; and the solution might seem too easy; all you need to do is tell yourself that you are enough every single day. Now, when you start, you may not believe it at all.
This is where the idea of “fake it til’ you make it” comes into play, or better yet “Believe it till you become it!” You may not believe yourself as you begin to say it, but over time the concept will really start to sink in. The need to compensate for a feeling of lack will subside and you can be free to be yourself.
A great way to really embrace it is looking in the mirror after a shower and saying you’re enough. Say it after you wake up and before you go to bed. Understand that no amount of money, friends or material possessions will create the feeling of being worthy and enough, it can only come from within you. You are already enough.
The final tip for being mentally untouchable is becoming fully present in the moment to allow yourself to de-stress whatever is going on. When we are stressed, we are not focused on what is in front of us but rather what is playing out in our head.
This practice requires you to simply focus on something right in front of you and pay attention to it. If you are sitting at a table, look at the table itself. Examine it, and breathe deeply to stay in the present moment. Keep your thoughts focused on what is right there, right now.