Sometimes our empathy become our Achilles heel. That happens when we forget our own needs and ourselves.
There is a difference between self-sacrifice, self-denial and being an emotional asset in the life of others.
The mechanics gone wrong are often seen when we simply say: Self-denial, as in denying Self, is a way to deal with the ego and thereby take it down. Self-denial has never been a tool for that. Self-discipline has.
On the contrary, self-denial makes people very unhappy like: “I´m really helping out here, denying myself and my inner needs, but something is not right.”
We have to look into the mechanics of acquired helplessness, which is the Matrix in the balance between giving and ‘letting it be’.
All too often I have seen well-meaning folks unintentionally creating interdependence between the person they try to help/serve and themselves.
That can take a good warrior down.
It is difficult and it is a very fine balance of adding just precisely the amount of help needed on an emotional level, and by doing so, also being very vigilant towards the anatomy of the energetics in the loop between those of the helper and the person in need of help.
That goes for dependency and knowing that people have to ‘learn by doing’ and you can’t take responsibility for the outcome. That is not helping out, that is a control mechanism.
We have to go where the road takes us and there are obstacles on the way. You can’t foresee and protect people from the bumps on their path. If a person asks you to do so, you’re dealing with a person who does not want to take responsibility for their life. They have to learn that skill and then you can engage. Because their agenda, and it can be very well hidden even from themselves, is dependency in order to avoid that responsibility. Not cool. Leave them be.
The Matrix in that can be solved if the emotional architect is very well grounded, conscious, neutral and aware of their own energetic core.
If you have this skill, never allow yourself to get drained.